Saving Your Marriage Against All Odds
It’s nothing new to say that cases of divorce is on the increase. People have blamed this on many varying issues. A basic fact is that despite this dismal report, your marriage doesn’t have to travel that same path. Your marriage can be one of the different cases.
When we look around us, we would see marriages that have lasted for quite long. Do you assume they didn’t encounter challenges? None of these were spared from encountering challenges. If you look closely, you may find out that a couple of them have actually had to deal with more serious problems. What was their sustaining force? Commitment!
Talking about saving your marriage, this is a process that would require full commitment. When you’re committed, you can then do all you have to do.
Some marriages are on the verge of a total breakup because of an affair. This is one problem that a lot of people believe cannot be repaired.
You can actually be taught how to survive an affair. I have witnessed marriages that recovered from the challenge of an affair and are now much stronger. Don’t ever forget that it needs work. To even achieve this, your commitment to saving your marriage mustn’t for one moment be shaky.
This writeup wouldn’t be delving deep into this issue. Our approach would be asking ourselves a couple of questions. We believe that in answering some of the questions, we would have some clarity.
The issue of an affair would normally raise two thoughts in the spouse. The first is the hurt and pain that is associated with the sense of betrayal. Next, a bit of self doubt comes in. This is what results in their seemingly unexplainable eagerness to meet the person the affair was with.
This usually is an attempt at seeing what the other individual has that they do not have. This can cause a loss of self confidence. If this self confidence isn’t restored, you cannot forgive your spouse and your marriage cannot be restored.
How do you go about rebuilding this self confidence?
Embarking on this process needs that you first find out if you really want to repair the marriage. You wouldn’t make any progress if your mind is not focused on restoring your marriage.
The process now truly starts with your attempting to find out the actual cause of the affair. Many times, when a spouse does not get the attention they crave at home, they look for it outside. You may discover that your partner just responded to a need you weren’t around to meet.
Your confidence may be rebuilt if you know that you can really give your partner all they desire. Note that nothing is good enough a reason for infidelity so we are not making excuses for anyone. The reason for what you’re doing is to eventually save your marriage.
Your next assignment is forgiving yourself for any failings you may have uncovered. You can’t forgive your spouse unless you forgive yourself. It’s after all these, that you can then start trying to rebuild trust.
Going through this process would certainly not be as easy as it is to write it. However, note that your marriage can grow to much higher levels even after an affair. Finally, is saving your marriage a concern for you?