Cheating, Infidelity, Spirituality, and Marriage: 7 Ways to Betray Your Spouse
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One of the most popular love topics people
ask us about is infidelity and how it relates to
fate and karma.
The American Heritage English Dictionary defines
infidelity as Lack of fidelity or loyalty, especially
to a spouse. It defines fidelity as Faithfulness to
obligations or duties.
Let’s consider several forms of infidelity, besides
1. Withholding affection, and s.e.x in your marriage
or relationship, for whatever reason, causes a huge
divide between you and your partner. Respect
deteriorates, as does trust. Everyone wants to be
valued and needed. If someone is denied affection
or s.e.x in their relationship, they may feel justified
in getting it elsewhere. Would that incur negative
karma, you ask? If it involved lying and deception,
it’s likely to, as would using sex as a bargaining chip
or manipulation tool in a relationship.
2. Being fiscally irresponsible.
3. Allowing yourself to become unattractive to your
partner, such as gaining a lot of weight, is considered
by some just as bad as fooling around behind your
4. Suddenly ignoring your partner’s emotional needs
or their need to connect with you on any other level,
such as intellectual.
5. Carrying on an emotionally intimate relationship
with a person other than your spouse, flirting
(in-person and online), and even fantasizing about
someone other than your spouse (even though
from a spiritual viewpoint, it’s natural) could be
considered forms of infidelity. Some have asked us
if we believe mutually agreed upon non-monogamy
creates negative karma and our response is always
no, if you are honest and act responsibly with all
6. Not making time spent with your partner a
priority, while always going out with your friends
instead could be considered a form of infidelity.
7. Promising to cook and run the household in
return for your significant other providing financially,
then failing to uphold your end of the bargain after
getting married is infidelity and also creates negative
Changing your tune in any way that disappoints
your partner, after the commitment has been made,
could be considered a form of infidelity. This also
applies to unspoken agreements and when a person
has represented themselves to be a certain way.
In an attempt to maintain fidelity (and in some cases,
ignore destiny and karma), prenuptial agreements are
common today. Some think prenups should also include
things like how household chores will be divided, and
exactly how much s.e.x (frequency, style, required
attitude about it, etc.) will be included in the union.
After all, as traditional marriage is a legally-binding
agreement, like a business arrangement, each partner
could be said to be legally obligated to uphold their
part of the deal.
It’s unknown what exactly a partner would do in 5,
10, 20, or more years if they’re not getting what
they want and need in their relationship. Therefore,
taking a business-like approach to love (legally-
binding agreement, i.e., marriage certificate)
demands business-like negotiations prior to the
event in the interest of fairness and to protect
Not very romantic, you say? Neither is a 60%
divorce rate in the U.S. and the fact that many
(statistics say about 50%) of those who don’t
divorce are cheating.
However, from a spiritual viewpoint, you can’t
expect your lover to act a certain way and then
honestly say you are expressing unconditional
love. Unconditional means that you are expecting
nothing in return. Yet in today’s world, where
life savings, businesses, careers, the security of
children and more are at stake, a less than
pragmatic approach with relationships is often
Attempts to re-write personal fate and avoid your
karma with a legally-binding contract may never be
successful, but openly and realistically discussing
hopes and expectations in the beginning of a
relationship will at least help now. Putting them in
writing will help later.
If one disappoints, should the other be f.r.e.e to
investigate other options without financial or other
penalties? Perhaps that should be part of the
contract as well.
Copyright © Scott Petullo, Stephen Petullo